crap. i forgot to send my mom a card. you would think counting every day of october in an ink drawing i would remember the 23rd is her birthday…crap. happy birthday, mom! you are probably getting a homemade card!! of course, it was my mom who always told me homemade presents mean the most….
today is another ink blot test. i think the rest of the month will be so as well. maybe the rest of my life because they are so much fun to do. i found another ape & another goddamned unicorn ( i so don’t want to be the kind of artist who does unicorn pictures–no offense to artists who do unicorn pictures!! different strokes and all that )
i get impatient with waiting for ink to dry. and this is on a journal page, not paper intended for a lot of water–so there is smudges & musses. by the way–this is the last page of my journal!! i did go ahead and order 3 more journals from artists & craftsmen (they were a really good price & i keep worrying that life as we know it is going to come to a standstill & i will be trapped in the country with no art supplies…i don’t want to have to kill trees to make paper…crap, i forgot to make sure i was getting recycled paper…arrrgh!)
but, as i was saying, this is the last page of a journal i started on the 4th of november, 2014. i used it for my water color class. remember that? gertrude buttons? good times! so i have been piddling in this thing for almost 2 years. wow. i need to fill the new ones up a bit faster…unless life as we know it ends & i am forced to conserve paper….
this is my favorite part of the day. the finishing & posting the inking of the day. the seeing how it turned out. the writing this post in my head as i shade and ink.
crap…what was i going to say? damn minions demanding my attention. ahhh….
oh! yeah! so–have you ever been yelled at by your tarot cards? it is quite the experience, believe you me. i have a very shout-y deck of tarot cards. i have been avoiding them for ages because they always want me to be fixing things about myself. getting rid of dusty. taking my art seriously….
taking my art seriously. that is what they yelled at me about last night. yelling tarot cards looks something like getting a spread full of major arcana (cards about being on a higher plane & doing serious work) and then having them all be inverted (upside down.) for you non-tarot people. upside down is generally bad bad bad.
yes, i don’t take my art seriously. as i told a friend today, i always have this voice in my head saying, “that’s a really nice little picture there. too bad it’s not real art.”
so i have to take my art more seriously or suffer the wrath of my cranky tarot cards…any ideas? tips? where do i go? who do i bother?
i’m going to have to start googling stuff.
i’m off. out of whack. my zen is broken. i started one inking today at misha’s speech therapy appointment, and it somehow ended up with a puppy in it?? then this one has a unicorn? i dunno. i’m not feeling it today. i just kept adding more & more ink until i didn’t absolutely hate it.
my zen is off. i’m a mess.
i had two birthdays in a row. poppy & then fidgit. i managed to bake cakes for both of them…but i still felt like i was somehow phoning it in.
i think i am exhausted by my non-relationship with dusty. i have asked him to leave. i have asked him why he is even living here in the first place. he said, “you are totally discounting my relationship with the kids.” i told him he can have a relationship with the kids while living somewhere else. other divorced people don’t live together. i really think we should try that.
so he is squatting at my parents house. not paying rent. not paying anything. not working. sometimes helping with the kids. he thinks mowing the lawn & burning things has given him some sort of helper status….
okay, this has nothing to do with my art other than the fact that i am letting his energy sapping ways drain my creativity.
or, i am going to blame him for my sucky picture today.
but inktober continues, and i refuse to miss a day.
so here is my sucky picture.
it is another ink blot test. and i resisted & resisted & resisted and then finally gave in to the sheep that i could see being catapulted at the dragon.
i blame dusty.
again i forgot to do some wet ink prep.
i was digging in my garden all day. trying to get some planting done while the moon is full. so i sat in the dirt all day. tossing grubs to the chickens (but keeping the red wrigglers & night crawlers safe!) enjoying the cool, sunny fall weather. watching the moon rise.
recently i was at goodwill buying plates and a woman commented as to whether the plates i had would work in a microwave or not. i said, “well, i don’t have a microwave–so they should be okay.” she gave me a funny look that i am used to getting. so i explained, “i like to do things the hard way.” like digging out garden beds by hand. i use a shovel & i break up the clumps by hand. i like it like that. just me & the dirt & the worms. it feels good on my soul…but so hard on my body!
i am buggered out. so tired! i just want to crawl into bed.
i did some colored ink on paper that became two dragons and when i was almost done, i decided i hated it. then i did this one. full moon. black & white.
oh! and a pony. misha wanted a pony.
(iggy took off with the dragon picture. he insisted that it did not look like crap.)
i have more garden work tomorrow.
but hopefully i will have a little bit more umph for my daily inking.