page 36

here it is. i’m afraid my scanner sucks. and i am kind of distracted so my work looks sloppier than usual. but here is page 37. i hope it is readable. also enjoyable. if you feel like you have forgotten the plot line due to how long it has been since i last posted…go over to moses jones on tapastic where you can read the entire story from start to end.

recap of my roadblocks to page 36:

packing
moving (like four times over the summer??)
homelessness
dusty’s infidelity
broken elbow
and, of course, the ever present & delightfully distracting minions….

but it is here now…& that is what matters. right?

so today i go back to art school at uw. i am taking an introduction to digital media & intermediate drawing. so watch out, people. i’m only getting better from here.

while my children scream at me

i sneak away to my scanner….
since my camera is sad these days, i will try scanning more. since i have a home again, i will try scanning more.

i finally have the right ink in my pens. though this page was done before it occurred to me that i could dump the wrong ink out of my pen and refill it with the right ink. i was just trying to run it out by using my pen. my pen was not digging that and no amount of shaking or tapping was getting it to draw. so this journal page is a bit rough. also, i was using styles that aren’t mine. just for fun.

iggy called the bikini top “weed boob sacks”–ha!

i’m still reading amanda palmer’s book. i am tempted to contact her. maybe i will. she touts her own accessibility quite a lot in her book, however, i am new to the fan base…and i think i just rub people the wrong way–so i dread contacting her & being ignored. as she says in her book, social rejection hurts as much as physical pain. it does. plus, i realize that i may never be good at asking. as a child, i was ignored by my parents. the fourth of six, they just kinda forgot about me. they were pretty lackluster parents to begin with, and i was lost in the shuffle. instead of making a ruckus–like poppy does (i admire his 4th child technique of constantly demanding he get at least equal consideration, even though said technique exhausts me!)–instead of demanding attention–i decided to disappear. my feeling, even as a young child, was that if they weren’t going to give me the attention i deserved, i would not stoop to ask for it.

and i didn’t.

and now the art of asking is an art that i cannot grasp.

though i need to.

so how do i start interacting on a better level with my fan base? how do i reach out to people? how do i become human? these are the puzzles i occupy myself with these days. i hope to figure it out. being a successful artist & writer is important to me, but it may never happen if i do not learn how to interact with my audience.

ay fuck.

as for moses jones…my living room is still full of the wrong furniture & unpacked boxes. my desk sits amidst the mess, calling to me. hopefully, i will get the excess furniture & boxes out of the living room tonight so i can set up my desk & feel like myself again. and get some pages of mojo out to y’all. soon!

new-used toys for the stay-at-home artist

here’s a snap of my work space & my two newest (used!) toys. the scanner came from amazon–the paper cutter thingy came from st. vinny’s (a catholic thrift shop i frequent.) i like to pretend that the blade is my katana and that i am fighting zombies when i trim my water color sheets. see, i need water color paper to handle the water from painting with ink; however, water color paper comes in 9X12 and scanners take sheets at eight and a half by eleven. before finding my new “katana” at st. vinny’s, i had been inking in a border to keep my pages the right size because it took too much time to measure & cut with scissors…and i think i have established that i don’t like extra steps in my process. but now i can just slap a sheet of water color paper onto the paper cutter which measures & cuts all in one.

i love little miracles.

speaking of little miracles. the man in my life whom dusty knickers is based on is back “on” in our on again off again relationship. but do not fret, dear reader, i am not going to let this effect my productivity–this time. i am determined to find a somewhat healthy balance in my life. moses jones is an important part of that balancing act.

now, just for fun & because she is so adorable, here is a snap of my inspiration for the character of misha.

scanner 009

happy st. patrick’s day.

i suck at networking

i am so stressed out from trying to network.

seriously.

i suck. i am an introvert with a capitol “I”. (see, you know i’m serious because i never capitalize anything on this blog.) being an introvert–an introvert born under the sign of cancer–such as i am, i am terrible at small talk. terrible at sucking up. terrible at being anything but sincere. if i “like” something you have done…if i comment…if i follow you, i have to feel it. i can’t do it just to put my face, name, and blog out there. i have to feel it. this makes me terrible at networking. plus! i am apparently really bad at going to the page of someone who has “liked” or “followed” or made my work their “favorite”–i am terrible about going to their page and thanking them. i feel weird doing this. it just seems over the top. but everyone else is doing it. am i rude? i am rude. i “ghost” when i leave a place. (i just learned this term for someone like me who does not say “goodbye.”) i am told often that people–before they got to know me–were afraid of me. i come off as aloof, bitchy, snooty, pick your adjective. but i’m not any of those things. okay. i can be bitchy. and i’m snooty about beer and books…. sigh.

i’m nice.

really people.

if you need a ride to the airport, or someone to watch your kids at the last minute, i would totally be there for you!

but i can’t seem to figure it out enough to show common courtesy on the internet. how ’bout this–if you have liked anything of mine in the past or are going to in the future–if you are following me or making my work one of your favorites–thank you! thank you! thank you! and if i like you back…if i follow you…you can know i am doing it because i really like your stuff. isn’t that a good thing? that has to be a good thing.

in other news, i posted–via a snapshot as i still haven’t gotten around to using a scanner and the one i ordered is saying it won’t be here until the end of the month–page 27 in progress. i am definitely getting better at drawing my characters. i fucked this page up the first time, but i like it better now. it needs more ink. obviously! but it is on its way to being finished. yay!

and remember, i love everybody…especially you.

more diddling

last night, i started doodling around with the idea of my childhood “hey diddle diddle” comic. i was in the middle of dismissing it as a bad idea. silly. when i started making the characters a bit more freaky looking. it appealed to me. i don’t know if i will continue with this story idea or not…but i definitely like the freakier approach.

i need a scanner. my camera sucks. i looked at one used scanner from craigslist & it was so old it wouldn’t work with a laptop…or would require figuring out cords, etc. and if you haven’t guessed by my low tech artwork, i am not the most tech-savvy person. i could try to sneak out to the printer’s down the street & use their scanner…but i so so so want one of my own. i keep thinking–but i need it to establish myself as an artist! am i rationalizing? (i don’t want an answer here.) i feel like i am rationalizing, but i also feel like a good scanner might help my confidence with my work. sigh.

how about if i sell my car i can buy a scanner? is that an ecological footprint trade-off?

i worry a lot that my ink & brush all hand done artwork can’t compete with all the slick comics out there that use a lot of stuff i don’t even know how to use or where i would find them or what it is called even…sigh.

but i doodle on. hoping to find my tribe of luddite graphic novelists.

more diddly 010 more diddly 011

i tried to see if the ink & brush technique i use with moses jones would work with this idea. and then i just doodled some chick. huh, that sounds wrong. oh well.

more diddly 004

doodle on, y’all.

more on my dead printer

sadly, this is about all my printer/copier/and most importantly–scanner is good for now.  a place to rest.  headed for its own resting place at HP Consumer Buyback & Planet Partners Recycling Program.  (check it out for recycling your technology!)

i figured out that i can still post photos here.  of course, photos of my work might not be as clear, but that is an option while i figure out if & how i can get a new scanner to upload my art.  of course, my poor camera has a limited lifespan as well and tends to fall apart every time it is dropped on the floor by sticky little kids.  and my laptop–also sticky and abused.  having four kids.  technology not made to last.  not a good mix for a poor mother.  my minions abuse my toys, and it is expensive to replace said toys.  i’m afraid the death of my scanner is just a prelude to a technological strike amid my household electronics.

on the topic of my art & moses jones.  slowly.  slowly the wheels of progress turn.

my scanner just died…

i was going to scan in some doodles & sketches because i have not been able to get any pages done. the page i was working on, i messed up and now i have to start over.

and now my scanner is dead.  there is no light.  it pretends to scan, but everything just comes out black.

that can’t be good.

so i have to buy a new scanner…with no money.

ironically, i was going to post about how i need to figure out how to draw more attention to my work so that i might actually make some money?  or at least get a bigger audience for my work.

and now i can’t even post new work…here’s a re-run.  tank girl as van gogh in pastel.

sigh.

update:  after the initial pain and horror of looking at the black screen & thinking, “that’s exactly how i feel right now,” i do have to realize my scanner (which long ago lost its ability to print & copy) is pretty old.  i honestly do not remember when i bought it.  a new one might do my art more justice & not have that blurry spot that is on all of my scans.  i think i can find a scanner-only for $50.  it bends/breaks my buy-nothing new rule (i blog more about this over at quixoticmama.com)–unless i look for a used one.  i also need to find where i can donate/recycle my dead scanner.  i am living on an extremely limited income.  this morning my ex-husband told me he doesn’t even think phone sex is a thing anymore, so i don’t know what i am going to do for money.  being paid for art would be unbelievable.  which is how i feel about it right now, unable to believe (in myself.)

poop.